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What not to do in G-town

2007-06-22 17:25

…Have sex while drunk
You risk being stuck – literally, with somebody who hasn’t had a shower for a few days. Besides, drunken sex only leads to regret. No matter what it's done for cricket players, Sheep are overrated.

…Book tickets for shows with these keywords
Never book tickets for anything with the word "Tribute" in its title. Your long-lost aunt from Pretoria will be there. And if it's called "Vagina" something, it is not about sex, it's about period pain.

…Hitch a lift
It’s even more important not to hitch a lift with the police, especially when stoned. If we need to explain why, you're lost to us already. …Opt for Student Digs
If you expect to get any sleep if you're staying in Res, it’s not gonna happen. Nor is that warm shower you were hoping for. Best just use your cash to upgrade your accommodation.

…Get a picture taken
Especially, if you are wearing one of those ridiculous hats. The image will haunt you for the rest of your life.

… Wear stilettos
Unless you need a sharp object with which to kill a hippie, you're better off in All Stars.

…Expect to see much art
You’ll end up like the rest of the unsuspecting visitors, out of your mind drunk eighty percent of the time.

… Try and do the trip alone
Statistics have shown that there’s a rise is hi-jackings by sheep, led by Ed the Sheep. Click here to see mug shot of Ed.

…Make eye contact with sheep, cops or loners
If we have to explain why, you're already one of them.

…Go looking for weed
...It’ll find you.

- staff
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