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I am a communist homo Satanist

2010-11-11 13:39
"I hate your mother's screaming crotch fruit. Should have definitely used the coat hanger when she was expecting you."

Sigh. I’m going to miss reading messages like that first thing in the morning, now that the anthropological experiment that was the anonymous comments boards have been phased out.

It’s no surprise that reader response to the new registration-based system has been positive. Anonymous commentary was a stupid-powered hate machine that would laugh psychotically while beating you to death with your own pet. Tasteless, sure, but often hilarious.

So as News24 progresses towards a more responsible form of freedom of expression, let’s honour the loss of this crystal window to obnoxious honesty. Here is a compilation of some of the best comments (original spelling intact) I’ve received in recent columns, which could only have been written by the confidently untraceable.

My girlfriend who is a foreigner saw your photo at the top of the page and said you look like some kind of pervert 
– anon uses his alien chick as a stick to beat me with.

Chris, your parents should have used a condom. Then my day wouldn't have been ruined with this pathetic self-centered article – my baby-hate ruins Josie’s day.

You are a piece of malnourished shit. fuck you. – signed "your mother". Mom?

Your mother just added water to something coming out of a farm long-drop and stirred and there you were 
– Anonymous is psychic?

if i was your mother chris i'd swallow u up just so that i could abort u! i dont need to have cildren to know that u are twisted, self-centrerd and lonely. i feel so sorry for u boy! – thobile’s has a unique take on biology.

Were you hiogh wjhen you wrote this article? – too easy.

This article is P**s Po*R – I love the way Anon censors 'poor'.

I have had my car stolen, been shot at and broken into 3 times. Lets see if you like it when that happens – Frikkie lives in a shitty neighbourhood.

Chris love you don`t look like you would put up much resistance to muggers and probably avoid non-middleclass blacks like the plague. Thats why you ain`t had your cherry popped yet – I’m still waiting on John’s invoice for this tearful session.

Not you again! You post the most rediculous rubbish articles! Do you work??? You look like one of the homeless "high as a kite" bergies that hang around Obs night spots. Clean yourself up, Get a life and then maybe the world will be interested in your verbal garbage. You do not look good in real life. Soap is very cheap by the way – Antony giving me the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.

My dad gave me plenty of hidings when I was younger and I grew up to be just fine. It is this gay, women`s lib, BS crap attitude of people today.
– Arthur is not nearly as well-adjusted as he thinks.

Not only are you promoting secular humanistic views, you are in direct violation of Gods Word that teaches us, "to spare the rod is to spoil the child"… I call on all parents to stand up against these backbone-less people who want to fall for this cheap Satanistic humanistic propaganda… Bring back corporal punishment and let all these unruly childrens earwax be melted from the bottom up – Hein goes for the Dad of the Year Award

Come on Chris...out with it...those Catholic Priests did more than just cane you didn't they??? I know a good psychologist – Paul gloats at boy-rape.

Can't wait til somebody makes a movie about the White genocide / farm murders going on in God's own country -
- Silver Surfer wants Spielberg’s cell number.

Versigtig loop, jou klein kak
– Tmax asks for directions to the beach, or something.

We are bored with your senseless "articles" little man. – fullmoon stuck around for months before giving up.

Wwhy do you always knock white men? Is it some low self esteem issue or something? Or are you just scared of posting something about black men? Stop being such a pussy man! – Tiaan stands for equality and injustice.

I smell something burning, oh yes, its most of you in a couple of years – Koos predicts a warm summer.

The drug users the prostitutes the fraudsters, just build something in the Kalahari and lock the lot of them in there for good. – Listen to Geejay; solve everything.

Chris you are still an idiot that should be banned from taking part in any form of literature, it seems to me you are one of those worthless scum that should be dressed in the flag and set alight – Willie gets all Taliban on my ass.

STOP trying to shove your lack of morality and disgusting life style down our throats. What next, defending paedophiles and beastiality... after all if it feels GOOD then it MUST BE RIGHT.... DISGUSTING! – Des is South Africa’s answer to Faith Popcorn.

Now it all makes sense why you hate having kids so much, you have to hate making kids to justify your gayness! – Anon1 has it all worked out.

Why are "open-minded" people so full of themselves? it is in Leviticus where it is stated amoungst other things [SNIP] – you can read the rest of Tony’s post in a bible near you.

Chris, since when is being a trassie OK? I mean, for heaven's sake, Men were created with something, and women not. Use your common sence!!!! You don't see gay dogs / gay cats, at least they realise what goes where. Trassie!
– I only included H’s comment because I don’t know what a 'trassie' is. Anyone?

It's about bloody time that blacks get the chip off their shoulders and realise that they are k*****s. They can call us names, so bugger them – thanks, Steve. Racist much?

Hey moffie. Ek sal jou so vol vleis maak jou oe sal lyk soos slaghuisvensters he he he
– Poacher is his own appreciative audience.

Jaa Chris Macshitfoy.... to be honest... this is the biggest load of crap you have ever written.... and then to try and look intelligent '' which we know you are clearly not because of your 35% pass rate in Matric and that after the syllabus were lowered to accommodate yourself..….)and then you couldnt even do army for a year because you such a loser, and know your trying to eat on the flesh and fame of others…. You are a sick dumb Brit! Rather go back to Britain as I know they will eat the crap you write for breakfast! I really hope that news 24 is not paying you for this crap…?? News 24? – one day, Onestone will write my biography.

…and there’s plenty, plenty more where that came from. And since this is my space, I thought I’d end off with a comment of my own, in reply to one Toram Whitelace, which I think sums up my feelings:

You got insulted because you’re a pompous, humourless twat. You insult my character… and expect polite silence? Finally, your obvious fanning of yourself on this page is very much in keeping with a guy who has nothing better to do on a Friday night than spout pseudo-intellectual gibberish at someone they dislike. Don’t you have even a shred of dignity? Reading your comments makes me feel like I’ve just watched a dying pig eat its own vomit.

Goodbye, Anonymous. I’ll miss you.

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