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Top 10 Tinseltown Tips for Recession Recovery

2009-07-10 13:15

You may be thinking you’re having a rough time of it because the only takeaways you can afford are Mom’s leftovers, but you’re not alone. Try surviving without your private jet or wearing the same dress TWICE! Celebs are tightening their belts (besides Oprah, don’t know if she can spare another notch) and losing the luxuries to cope with the recession. So if you’re struggling to survive sans your designer perfume and hourly Frappacino, listen up to this star-studded advice. 

10. Don’t let death get you down
Take cues from Kenny Ortega, Michael Jackson’s concert promoter. Just because his star died before the sell-out 50 night residence at the O2 Arena, doesn’t mean he’s got to lose out. Instead, work with what you’ve got. Turn what is supposed to be a poignant memorial event into a televised circus and hey presto! You’re on your way to financial recovery.

9. Learn Japanese
Brad Pitt’s got a big family and he needs to bring home a lot of bacon. To subdue those talks of earning less than his girlfriend, Hollywood’s most famous dad has his face plastered all over Japan selling anything from cellphones to coffee. And he’s not the only one. Other celebs who like to earn a little sushi on the side include Cameron Diaz, Arnold Schwarzenegger (government doesn’t pay too well, Arnie?) and Hollywood’s other serial adopter, Madonna.

8. Don’t buy the cow – just the milk
Living on a budget doesn’t mean you can’t look fabulous – no matter who you are. The trick is to borrow, not buy. Jennifer Lopez accessorised with $50 000 worth of borrowed diamonds for a recent fashion launch. After having to close down her restaurant and launch her 468th ‘Glow’ fragrance, I can understand why the girl couldn’t dish out for more bling. Used jewellery is one thing, but used shoes? Keira Knightley apparently rents her expensive shoes for red carpet events. Eeew…

7. If you want pyramids, go to Egypt
Don’t get duped like poor Kevin Bacon. Mr Footloose and his wife were swindled when they invested in the Ponzi Scheme with shamster Bernard Madoff. Don’t the words ‘Ponzi Scheme’ just stink of trouble?  The main lesson is there are no quick fixes in these tough times – so hold onto your piggy (haha) bank!

6. Travel lightly
While private planes are very useful for a detailed entourage and cases of Cristal, they aren’t exactly economical or environmental. P Diddy has done the noble thing by grounding his Gulf Stream jet and opting to fly commercial airlines instead. Shock! Horror!

5. Invite everyone to your birthday party
But make sure there’s a cover charge. Lindsay Lohan has been dodging bankruptcy for many years with this frugal tip. Recently the Mean Girl hosted her public 23rd birthday party at the MGM Grand – but apparently the casino paid her $70 000 for the courtesy. She may look like a bimbo but she sure knows how to milk her trainwreck status for all its worth.

4.  Less is more
Once you open yourself up to the idea, you’ll discover you can manage without your London pad. You’ve still got the Malibu beach house and the Beverly Hills digs anyway. Elle MacPherson realised this a while ago and tried to sell her Notting Hill mansion – but hasn’t succeeded. Even after dropping the price by more than £2 million, she’s still stuck with the now £7.5 million, six bedroom home.  Just because you blew a ridiculous amount on a home, don’t expect others to be done in.

3. Use public transport
 Fuel prices and interest rates just make it impossible to go cruising through the countryside in your swanky soft top, even if you’re a star. British singer Lily Allen recently had to sell her BMW 320 Convertible because of money troubles. Poor thing. But I suppose its best since she’s hardly ever sober enough to drive.

2. Stay at home
Touring all over the world is an expensive business. So unless it’s worth your while, rather stick to performing on home soil.  Janet Jackson had her tour of Japan cancelled this year because it wasn’t profitable. And that was just the start of a real shitty year for the Discipline-d star.

1. Recycle your style
The easiest way to beating the recession blues is to curb your brand name buying by wearing your outfits more than once. Follow the cue of the world’s most stylish soccer mom, Victoria Beckham. She was spotted wearing the same dress in the space of a few months. She funked it up with different accessories and shoes. Rockers Chris Martin from Coldplay and Brandon Flowers from The Killers were both spotted re-using previous award show jackets at this year’s Brit Awards. Tori Spelling has also admitted to the ultimate fashion faux pas due to dollar dilemmas. So what was once frowned upon is now frugally chic in Hollywood. And at home, too. Generations star Katlego Danke’s reputedly been cutting back on shoes. Go local!

Get your budget-beating on.

Celebs know all about cutting back on luxuries. So if you’re struggling to survive sans your designer perfume and hourly Frappacino, listen up to this star-studded advice.
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