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The Best and Worst of Cannes 2013

2013-05-28 16:25
2013 Cannes Film Festival
Oh, how we wish we'd actually been there! Alas, we had to enjoy the glitz and glory of the most prestigious film festival in the world from the comforting glow of our desktops as stars such as Nicole Kidman, Eva Longoria, Marion Cotillard and Emma Watson glided down the most photographed red carpet – outside of the Oscars.

The gowns were magnificent, the films being showcased were as equally feted and reviled as every year, and the shows of public affection between actors and their directors was probably more theatrically apparent than ever.

So now that the rarefied dust of Cannes 2013 has settled, we take a look at some of the highs and lows from the festival we have pretty high on our bucket list.

Best Dressed - Nicole Kidman
The Cannes jury member had to work the red carpet harder than anyone else and routinely wowed in gorgeous flowing gowns by Valentino, L'wren Scott and Christian Dior that were by turns delicate, colourful and, above all, tasteful.

Worst Dressed - Heidi Klum
What was she even doing there?

Loudest Boos - Only God Forgives
Poor Ryan Gosling. He wasn't in Cannes this year, as he's back in the States shooting his directorial debut How to Catch a Monster, but that didn't stop the audience from giving his violent new movie Only God Forgives the Cannes version of the middle finger. Could Cannes have felt that aggrieved by Ryan's supposed snub?

Movie We Most Want to See (Part 1) - Blue is the Warmest Colour
It would be an understatement to say that this year's Palm d'Or winner (French title: La vie d'Adèle) has become an overnight sensation – and one of the most eagerly anticipated movie releases of the year. It tells of a teenage girl's sexual awakening when she meets an older woman with blue hair. One critic said it contains "the most explosively graphic lesbian sex scenes in recent memory". No SA release date has been announced yet. Expect that to change soon.
Watch a scene from the movie here.

Movie We Most Want to See (Part 2) - Inside Llewyn Davis
It's a 60s-set absurdist folk music tale from the legendary Coen brothers (No Country for Old Men, The Big Lebowski), with Drive stars Carey Mulligan and Oscar Isaac – so sign us up pronto!

Most PDA-tastic couple - Blue is the Warmest Colour co-stars
French actresses Lea Seydoux and Adele Exarchopoulos, who play lesbian lovers in the Palm d'Or winner, were very touchy-feely throughout the festival, planting chaste kisses on each other's cheeks at the red carpet premiere, which progressed to some rather intense clutches at the closing awards ceremony.

Most in Need of a Square Meal - The models at the amfAR benefit
While it's (unfortunately) not weird or strange to see stick-thin creatures in overpriced threads walk down the red carpet anymore, the specimens attending the annual Sharon Stone curated Aids benefit auction actually made me worry for their health.

Most Proudly SA moment - Blitz Patrollie gets a buyer!
Recently released SA buddy cop comedy Blitz Patrollie picked up an international distributor in Cannes, Germany's Picture Tree International. Director Andrew Wessels said the movie had a great reception at the Cannes market. Guess we’ll just have to take his word for it!
Read our review of Blitz Patrollie here.

Least Proudly SA moment - Zulu
While it's always great to see South African stories make their way onto the international stage, it almost always unfortunately turns out to be an all-too realistic and violent portrayal of life in some parts of this country. Zulu, which had the honour of closing this year's festival with stars Forest Whitaker and Orlando Bloom in attendance, is just such a scenario. It's time we change that.

Biggest Cannes facepalm - Copposites
The Guardian in the UK named SA comedy Copposites, starring Rob van Vuuren and Siv Ngesi as a cop and a crook who swap bodies and races, as one of the worst films on sale at the festival. Ouch!

Here's hoping I get to bring you the Cannes scoop straight from the French Riviera next year!


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