Snakes on a Plane

Synopsis:

After witnessing a brutal, gang-related murder by gangster Eddie Kim (Byron Lawson), Sean Jones (Nathan Phillips) is escorted by FBI agent Neville Flynn (Samuel Jackson) from Honolulu to Los Angeles, where he is to stand as a witness. But Kim has arranged for a crateful of poisonous snakes to be placed on board, which will be opened by a timelock mechanism while the plane is in mid flight. To make matters worse the leis, which are traditionally given to passengers on their departure from Hawaii, are sprayed with pheromones, which drive the snakes into an aggressive frenzy. The terrified passengers must fight for survival, and agent Flynn must protect his charge at all costs.

Review:

Snakes on a Plane (or SoaP, as it’s affectionately known), isn’t the first movie that was elevated to cult status on the internet before even being released. That honour goes to The Blair Witch Project, a film so dull and poorly shot that if it really was the student project it pretended to be, it would have failed.

After that cinematic debacle, you’d be forgiven if you never trusted the internet ever again. You might have already decided that if all those geeks on the internet think SoaP so great, it must be utterly horrible. But you’d be wrong.

Make no mistake: SoaP is a high concept, high budget no-brainer of a movie. The plot is almost non-existent, and the little that’s there is so ridiculous it’s impossible to imagine the screenwriter pitching it to studio executives with a straight face. Snakes? On a plane? Why? Couldn’t he just shoot the guy? And if the gangster was really able to get a crate-load of snakes past all that extra security, wouldn’t it have been easier, cheaper and far more reliable to just use poisonous gas instead?

Well, yes, but watching people slowly choke to death isn’t nearly as exciting as watching terrified, screaming people being bitten on their most delicate areas by enraged poisonous reptiles. There’s no sense in letting the plot get in the way of a good story.

Similarly, the characterisation is so unapologetically one-dimensional that at times the passengers seem to be no deeper than the snakes themselves. Stereotypes abound: there’s the mincing male flight attendant; the slutty female flight attendant; the snobby Briton; the hip hop trio and, of course, Samuel Jackson as himself – and that’s about as developed as they get.

But you’re not here to see Jackson’s character facing his weaknesses and overcoming emotional obstacles to find his redemption in the eyes of his one true love. Oh no, you’re here to see snakes killing lots of people in the most horrific ways imaginable – and that’s exactly what you get.

The set-up is mercifully short, and once the plane is in the air and the snakes are released, the pace is relentless. It’s suspenseful, graphically violent and sometimes quite tasteless, but it’s all done in good, campy fun, so it’s impossible to take it too seriously. With a title like that, how could anyone?

SoaP is a success because it delivers exactly what it promises– nothing more and nothing less, It’s airheaded, yes, but it’s unpretentious entertainment all the way, best enjoyed with a crowd of friends after a few drinks.

Go. You’ll love it.

- Chris McEvoy