Meet Iain Thomas, the 36-year-old South African poet who is famous all over the world except in SA

Trevor Noah has pulled out at the last minute from hosting the MAMAs 2016, due to 'a severe upper respiratory infection'

The Life Aquatic

2006-03-30 13:00


With a plan to exact revenge on a mythical shark that killed his partner, oceanographer Steve Zissou (Bill Murray) rallies a crew that includes his estranged wife (Anjelica Huston), a journalist (Cate Blanchett), an eccentric German sailor (Willem Dafoe) and a man who may or may not be his son (Owen Wilson).


Did you see "Rushmore"? I did, and was entirely beguiled by its eccentric whimsy.

There was also something compelling about the way director Wes Anderson treated his characters. Those lingering, awkward shots of Bill Murray, for example, peeling away first impressions to expose the uncertainty of a mensch winging it. Robert D. Yeoman's wonderful cinematography and the superb, resonant soundtrack filled out Anderson and Owen Wilson's script, and unsuspecting audiences were surprised by a self-conscious but gloriously satisfying film filled with hubris, maladroit poetry and just a hint of banality.

"Royal Tenenbaums", the next excursion by Anderson & Co, was a little less intimate, because of the arch paternal posturing by Gene Hackman, and the ever-present risk of additional cast members allowing their cinematic history to seep into their roles.... I'm thinking Ben Stiller and Gwyneth Paltrow in particular. But, perhaps surprisingly, given these initial misgivings, it holds its own against "Rushmore".

Which is why my almost absolute indifference to "The Life Aquatic" is so bothersome. It ought to be a good film. A great film. But it's not. No matter how hard Anderson devotees try to convince you otherwise, don't let yourself be fooled: "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou" is a damp squid. Er, squib.

It's almost painful thinking back on it. I mean, were it truly awful it might at least have been fun to eviscerate it, but regrettably it was merely bland. On the face of it, it had all the ingredients for a killer feature. But clearly, something was missing.

Before we figure out what, exactly, let's look at what was added to Andersen's usual recipe.

  • Cate Blanchett. Um, nice enough. Loved her accent.
  • Willem Dafoe as a German sailor... maybe the best thing about the film really... I was very pleasantly surprised by his comedic beats - he was genuinely funny, something that certainly Bill Murray, bless him, or Owen Wilson weren't.
  • David Bowie songs sung during segue shots by a Portuguese singer/guitarist guesting as a crew member on Zissou's ship - charming, slightly.

Now, my best guess why there was no magic in "The Life Aquatic" was because Wilson wasn't involved in the scriptwriting this time around.

Yeah, Owen Wilson - scriptwriter. Who would have thought, right? I know I usually have him pigeon-holed as Jackie Chan or Ben Stiller's buddy film co-star, but from what I can make out, there's a whole layer of subtle and complex humour missing from the entire film, and I don't think it's far-fetched to ascribe this to Wilson's absence from the writing process.

Another problem is that the third act set piece - an underwater sequence involving the entire cast squeezed into a tiny submarine finally tracking down Zissou's quarry - the elusive Jaguar shark - does not come off as it was probably meant to, namely awe-inducing. I was expecting Henry Selick's stop-motion animation to be quite a bit more remarkable than it was. And the shark itself looked... low budget, as if it was envisioned as much more impressive than it turned out to be.

There's an tiny bit of ambiguity right at the end that vaguely suggests the events of the film could be seen in a different light if watched again... but it's not nearly suggestive enough for me to put myself through this beige piece of filmmaking again.

- By Matthew Du Plessis
Fans of Wes Anderson may try to convince you that this is a great film - don't listen to them - it's a big, beige, disappointment.

Jack Reacher: Never Go Back

2016-10-14 07:38

Giles 2005-04-06 08:52 AM
Shocking Stuff I have never been so bord in all my life! This movie wasted my evening and really had no point what so ever. The movie was thought to a great one to watch, however it was extremely shocking!!
Sean Senior 2005-04-06 08:56 AM
Oh My Greatness What a stunning movie! I thought the actresses were so hot AND SEXY!! The plot was clear and concise and everything made sense. I love you Steve Zissou!! Have my baby!
Intombi Ngiombi 2005-04-06 08:59 AM
Sho Sho Eish What s**t! bsolute Cr*p! Ibibi Isis Tishomni
Jane 2005-04-06 11:23 AM
Self indulgent and pointless Blame the trailer - having watched the trailer a few times I expected an offbeat comedy. As it turns out all the funny bits were in the trailer and not all that funny in the end. To make it worse the supposed sad parts were not so sad either which makes this a pointless and bland movie. What a disappointment!
Isnjonga 2005-04-06 02:37 PM
What a shocker I don't have a F#@$ed up clue what was happening here, what the hell kind of a movie is this, absolutly shocking
ali 2005-04-06 03:16 PM
yawn!! This was the first movie I ver walked out of - I just didn't care what happens in the end,still don't
carol 2005-04-06 09:29 PM

Recent Reviews

Jack Reacher: Never Go Back

2016-10-14 07:38

Just another typical Tom Cruise action film, with nothing to get too excited about. The film is loaded with action-film stereotypes and cheesy one-liners. Read More »
Add your review

Hands of Stone

2016-10-14 07:38

Hands of Stone is a bland, unlikable portrayal of a real-life boxer that struggles to hit the highs of Rocky IV let alone Raging Bull or the original Rocky. Mark this one down as “for boxing fanatics only”. Read More »
Add your review

There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.