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We're still recovering from some of these 2012 cinematic shockers. From the lame comedies, to the horrifyingly bad horrors, these are the big screen flops that made us cringe, rage and despair at what passes for entertainment. BY: SHAHEEMA BARODIEN
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10. HOUSE AT THE END OF THE STREET: Cynically released to cash in on Jennifer Lawrence's Hunger Games fame, this woefully unscary thriller sees J-Law go up against a creepy neighbour. Much of it makes no sense - not even the kind of slapdash sense deemed adequate for B-grade horrors - and what there is is a mess.
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9. MAD BUDDIES: Eish, it's not fun having to talk smack about Leon Schuster's recent output - but then it's no fun having to sit through it either. Schuster knows his audience inside out and delivers the goods, but oh boy Mad Buddies is disastrous. The gags are obvious and illogical, the tone is mean-spirited throughout, and the whole thing is as paint-by-numbers as they come. Though will SA fans care?
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8. THE WATCH: Look at that cast of tried and trusted funnymen. How could their combined talents result in something as crass and repellent as The Watch?
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7. CLOUD ATLAS: Erm, what the hell was that all about?
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6. THIS MEANS WAR: Another smart, likable cast wasted on a brainless piece of bubblegum. And how could any red-blooded woman choose Chris Pine over Tom Hardy?
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5. PIRANHA 3DD: When sequels go horribly wrong. A film that fails on every level to take advantage of the previous movie's unadulterated B-movie glory (
I named Piranha 3D one of my top movies of 2010 - no regrets), 3DD instead takes the lazy rule by dumbing itself down even further and shamelessly going for the boobs and gore shots. Nasty.
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4. WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING: I can't tell if Matthew Morrison is kissing or trying to eat Cameron Diaz's baby belly in that picture. Nor can I wrap my head around how a movie sort-of based on a pregnancy instruction manual could enrage me so much. Back away from the all-star ensemble rom-coms, Hollywood!
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3. THAT'S MY BOY: Dear, Adam Sandler. Please stop this nonsense right now and grow up.
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2. A THOUSAND WORDS: With such a long, infamous run of poorly received films, one could argue that the critics have it out for Eddie Murphy. And yet here is another example of that infuriatingly phoney persona at work - even when the script calls for him to be silent much of the time. Playing a conflicted husband, dad and class-A jerk, Eddie is nothing but consistent.
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1. PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 4: Who am I to argue with Channel24 readers who voted this the worst movie of the year? Thank heavens the Blair Witch Project filmmakers knew when to quit.
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CIRCLING THE DRAIN - BATTLESHIP: Taylor Kitsch has had a rough year, getting a lot of the backlash for the box office failings of both Batteship and Disney's not-as-bad-as-they-say John Carter. Both films were a little misguided but still lots of inoffensive fun.
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CIRCLING THE DRAIN - MADEA'S WITNESS PROTECTION/GOOD DEEDS/ALEX CROSS: If anyone should be read the riot act this year, it's Tyler Perry. In his various roles as a cross-dressing know-it-all, a conflicted nice guy and a homicide detective on trail of serial killer, Perry remained disingenuous and cloyingly uninspired throughout.
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CIRCLING THE DRAIN - THE LORAX: Dr Suess deserves better than this ugly, ill-conceived adaptation. And was their an eco message in there somewhere? Sorry, I was blinded by all the orange.
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CIRCLING THE DRAIN - TOTAL RECALL: As far as unnecessary remakes go, this one tops the list. By disregarding its plot and characters in favour of soulless action, it fails miserably to emulate the 1990 Paul Verhoeven cult classic starring
Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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