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The Cribs - Men’s Needs, Women’s Needs, Whatever

2007-08-27 09:07
Uh-huh. This is what happens to an indie band when they sign to a major label. Welcome to ‘sucking corporate rock cock 101’ or ‘how to force-feed punters a hard sell to make sure you shift enough units’. Damn, what happened to letting the music speak for itself?

Well, that’s precisely the problem with The Cribs: they don’t have a voice of their own. Their laundry basket of Stone Roses-washed Blur, Buzzcocks, Jam etc. might con sycophantic Kaiser Chiefs, Arctic Monkeys and Franz Ferdinand fans into believing songs about getting wasted (“Men’s Needs”), throwing your name away (“My Life Flashed Before My Eyes”) and scoring with coke whores (“I’m A Realist”) are “a tour de force” (Rolling Stone Magazine, no less).
But for everyone else oh-so-ironically epigrammatic song titles like “Our Bovine Public” speak volumes. This is the sound of a major label making a second division Brit-popped pub band an offer they can’t refuse: fifteen seconds of premier league chart fame. Shit, not even Lee Ranaldo doing his best Jack Kerouac impersonation on the sub-Sonic Youth spoken word crawl of “Be Safe” can save this slice of recycled rubbish.

- Miles Keylock

“Produced by Alex Kapranos of Franz Ferdinand” informs the sticker on the CD cover. “One of the year’s greatest indiepop triumphs” declares the Guardian Guide (also on the sticker). “Be prepared to believe the hype…self-aware, smart and stupendously hooky, The Cribs are a real life next band worth checking for” gushes Blender (the sticker again). “Come Autumn, they will be your favourite band” hails the NME (yep, still the sticker).

What to read next: Kalahari

hellyeah 2008-03-09 08:35 PM
AMAZING oh my word. its so ironic that people like you are exactly the people the cribs talk about so often. have you even LISTENED to this album? i agree its not as polished as it could be, but its their quirkiness and charm that their fans love so much about them. it makes so much sense as a follow up to Hey Scenesters. as for the suggestion that they are "sucking corporate rock cock 101", that doesnt even add up. if they truely were, they would be playing on South African radio. thats left for the bovine public bands that everyone seems to love so much. kaiser chiefs? arctic monkeys?? these guys arent even comparible to their sound. you clearly do not know enough about the cribs, or indie music, to review this album properly.

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