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Motoring: Girls’ big weekend out

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Citroën C4 Cactus

Price range: Feel – R229 000; Shine – R289 900

As a belated birthday treat, I take Lili, my newly adopted teenage daughter, out for high tea and dinner at the magnificent Cellars-Hohenort (old German for “high place”), which is nestled in the breathtaking Constantia Valley against the slopes of Table Mountain.

To get to one of Cape Town’s top hotels – an establishment the rich and famous often frequent – I opt for the cheeky and unpredictable with the funky Citroën C4 Cactus as our chosen set of wheels, rather than a Merc or Jag, of which there are plenty in the guest parking.

Bold in design with its revolutionary “air bump” protecting it from everyday bumps and scratches, the teen and I feel like two modern, high-heeled Tank Girls as we check in with our armour-clad ride on a blue-skied Saturday afternoon. We’re just in time for high tea, served to us on the Cellars’ terrace, surrounded by 9.5 hectares of exquisite fauna and flora, including picturesque beds of roses and 150-year-old camphor trees.

After an array of elegantly presented sandwiches, macaroons, tiny pecan pies, truffles and cupcakes, we make our way up to our suite, decorated in a burst of lemon yellows, golds and blue florals, all tastefully matched – perfect for a girls’ sleepover. It’s clear the beautiful gardens surrounding the 49-roomed hotel have served as inspiration for each of the individually decorated rooms.

Rates for the suites start at R6 700 and go up to R22 000 for the palatial Nelson Mandela suite.

Before dinner, we do some girl stuff: curl hair, giggle and post a marathon of pics on Instagram. In fact, what makes Lili such a perfect travel partner is that she’s as selfie obsessed as I am. Our posing carries over into dinner at the award-winning Conservatory, overseen by Cape Town’s only Relais andamp; Châteaux grand chef, Peter Tempelhoff.

As the starters of a blue cheese soufflé and rooibos-cured smoked salmon arrive, our phone cameras keep clicking away. Lili’s gourmet burger with cheddar cheese, onion rings and hand-cut chips is pure photographic and culinary heaven. I have a moment of food envy and a serious case of Fomo – fear of missing out – until my rather more sedate crispy duck arrives. I’ve opted for a favourite of the powerhouse hotelier and creator of The Collection group of properties, Liz McGrath, who passed away earlier this year.

Liz was right. The duck on a bed of pak choi and exotic mushrooms is culinary heaven. Between courses, we sip on a variety of sweet, fruit mocktails. By the end of the night, our stomachs ache from giggling and eating far too much, but how on earth can we pass on the dessert, croquembouche for two? The tower of chocolate profiteroles on a bed of almond sponge and valrhona dulcey ganache, topped off with salted caramel ice cream, deserves another no-need-to-filter round on Instagram.

We end the evening snuggling around the lounge fireplace with the house cat, a deliciously plump tortoiseshell tabby, and debate whether we’ll be caught kidnapping him in the Cactus.

Next morning, leaving our almost otherworldly night of luxurious cotton sheets, impeccable service and fine dining is hard, but at least there’s the drive back down Rhodes Drive in the Cactus to look forward to.

As we pass Kirstenbosch, the Cactus has a chance to show a bit of its stuff. It’s built on the impressive DS3 platform with the engine from the six-speed Peugeot 308 1.2 GT Line, although the Cactus makes do with just five gears. A three-cylinder engine may sound small, but it’s pretty punchy, with a good 205Nm of torque and a solid gearbox, impressive in stop-start city driving. Where it really impresses is the fuel consumption, with an average of just 7 litres per 100km. But let’s not get too technical.

Inside, we love the little hiding places and pockets to stash keys, phones and lipstick. The cute door handles resemble luggage strips and the simple-to-use touch screen infotainment system with sat nav, Bluetooth and reverse parking, as well as the front seats, are a big hit with my teen, who enthuses that they look like “chairs in ad offices!”

Although the soft-suspection Cactus – which looks deceptively big in pics, but only weighs as much as a Polo and is the size of your average Golf – may not get us into any real Tank Girl situations, in the city this übercool, funky ride is a real head-turner and exactly what two girls bent on having fun need.

Ferguson was a guest of Cellars-Hohenhort courtesy of The Collection. To read about their hotels, visit collectionmcgrath.com. To book, call 021 794 2137

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