The Hollywood magic of a beard

2013-08-13 11:52

Cape Town - Throughout the ages its secret powers have been kept hidden.

Like a roaring beast hidden in its secluded dungeon of absolute awesomeness the truth was safely guarded. Over the years some lucky men have stumbled across its majestic powers and have reaped the rewards, while others were blissfully unaware of the pure genius behind this powerful force.

In recent times Hollywood too has discovered the manly weapon of mass seduction. Like a vigorous blazing fire the truth has been revealed and has made its way onto red carpets, magazine covers and internet memes.

The magnificent power of this almighty growth of male facial hair has been released onto the world with ecstatic effects on both the male and female gender making even the strongest swoon at its blinding force.

Still don't know what we are talking about? (Because we are kinda running out of adjectives here)

Ladies and gentleman. We reveal the dark magic of the robust half-moon-hair-mask that can change a lamb into a lion before your very eyes.

Example one. The beard transforms mere mortal Jared Leto from boy band member to masculine man:

Example two. Chris Pine changes from grotesque tripple chinner to squinty eyed man of mystery:

Example three. Zac Efron goes from trying hard to look attractive to effortlessly exhubarating manliness that has everyone weak at the knees:

Example four. Paul Rudd transforms from Edward to Jacob in the blink of an eye. From pale vampire to powerful wolverine just like that:

Example five. Jake Gyllenhaal shifts from bleak bubble boy to utterly irresistible beau by simply throwing away his clipper:

Example six. Ben Affleck transmutes from a milky puddle of nothing into a gold statuesque figure of authority:

Example seven. George Clooney mutates from an old man into a powerful beast with a thousand silver daggers bursting from his powerful jawline:

Warning: Never ever underestimate the absolute power of the beard. Never. You have been warned.

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