Miss March

2009-05-29 16:14

What it's about:

From the moment childhood buddies Eugene Bell and Tucker Cleigh stumble upon a Playboy magazine while rummaging through an older brother’s closet, their paths in life diverge: for Eugene, shamed by the images of the female form, the magazine triggers an anxiety about sex; for Tucker, it stirs a sexual awakening that becomes an obsession.

Fast forward ten years: Eugene (Zach Cregger, “The Whitest Kids U’ Know”) is in love with his pious high school girlfriend, Cindi Whitehall (Raquel Alessi, Ghost Rider), with whom he preaches sexual abstinence to younger students. Meanwhile, the Playboy-crazed Tucker (Trevor Moore, “The Whitest Kids U’ Know”) harasses girls and dreams of experiencing the annual bash at Hugh Hefner’s Playboy Mansion.

After three years of abstinence with Eugene, Cindi decides she’s finally ready to consummate their romance. Eugene nervously agrees, and the couple sets prom night as the date when they will finally lose their virginity together. But the plan goes disastrously awry when Tucker gets Eugene so drunk in an effort to psyche him up for the big event that Eugene tumbles down a flight of stairs and blacks out.

After spending the next four years in a coma, Eugene awakens to discover his beloved Cindi has posed nude for Playboy. So begins the friends’ laugh-out-loud cross-country road trip to win back Cindi. Chased by Tucker’s crazed epileptic girlfriend and hordes of homicidal firefighters, will they make it to Los Angeles in time? Can their hip-hop artist friend, Horsedick.MPEG, get them into Hef’s famed abode? And will Cindi, the girl-next-door-turned-Miss March, want anything to do with the lovesick Eugene after so many lost years?

What the critics have to say:

"Forget waterboarding -- just show Guantanamo detainees Miss March and they'll say anything."
- James Berardinelli, ReelViews

"Forget March, this one misses by a mile."
- Kirk Honeycutt, Hollywood Reporter

"Anyone who goes to see Miss March hoping for a voyeuristic, ’80-flavored T&A smutfest will be sorely disappointed."
- Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly

"The movie's aiming for the drunken college crowd but most of the gags have the nervous, giggly idiocy of two middle-school kids flipping through dad's Playboy."
- Ty Burr, Boston Globe

After four years in a coma, Eugene Pratt is going to be reunited with his high school sweetheart. On pages 95-97.

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