The Snowman

What it's about:

When an elite crime squad’s lead detective investigates the disappearance of a victim on the first snow of winter, he fears an elusive serial killer may be active again. With the help of a brilliant recruit, the cop must connect decades-old cold cases to the brutal new one if he hopes to outwit this unthinkable evil before the next snowfall.

What we thought:

With its high profile cast and ominous setting, The Snowman promised something sinister and dark. Plus who doesn’t like a bit of Michael Fassbender to stare at for a good 2 hours? 

But alas I come bearing sad news. 

The Snowman is lacklustre attempt at a crime drama with very little counting in its favour. Instead of big screen flair and lots of suspense and drama, this icy flick has a “made for TV” feel to it.

It’s as pale as Oslo’s snowy white surroundings and about as exciting as a lukewarm glass of milk. 

Director Tomas Alfredson, known for his work on Let the Right One In and Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, fails to create any tension or mood as the story unfolds in a linear line constantly interrupted by short, staccato scenes that gives the mind no time to linger. 

This results in a rather limp finale and a plot twist so predictable you would be able to see it coming through a winter blizzard. 

Fassbender tries his best but not even this Hollywood heavyweight could save The Snowman from melting into a disappointing puddle. 

One performance that really stands out it is that of J.K. Simmons as Arve Støp, a mogul who preys on young women. It comes just as the Harvey Weinstein scandal makes headlines around the world and is absolutely bone-chilling to watch. 

Val Kilmer, who recently also starred alongside Fassbender in Song to Song, takes on the role of Gert Rafto in The Snowman. Unfortunately his drastic change in physical appearance is far too distracting to really appreciate anything he’s trying to do with the character.  

Unimaginative and dull, this icy flick moves at glacier pace and will leave you cold.