In partnership with

Now Thats What I Call Music 52

2009-08-17 18:33
Now That's Not What I Call Music

1. 'Now' anything is a really stupid name for a compilation.
2. Compilations like this tell you you're stupid.
3. Would you let a CD call you stupid?
4. Your 13-year-old Hannah Montana-loving niece likes this.
5. Therefore, you shouldn't be caught dead listening to it.

6. It's criminal to put Lady Gaga and Katy Perry on the same CD.
7. It's criminal to put Coldplay and Prime Circle on the same CD.
8. If you want to listen to 10 different genres in one sitting, you tune into 5fm. You don't buy a CD.
9. In 3 months time these songs will be like 'soooo last year'. And if you have this CD, so will you.
10. Our lives would suck less without it.
11. Even the artists hate being a part of this money spinner. Listen to Agnes' "Release Me".
12. I never want anyone to Kiss Me Thru The Phone. Eew.
13. Only lame compilations like this change Britney's song to the PC version.
14. Only lame compilations like this still consider Britney 'hip'. 
15. Now 52 kills Lily Allen's credibility. 

16. Now 52 kills Kelly Clarkson's credibility.
17. Now 52 kills Coldplay's credibility.
18. Now 52 kills Black Eyed Peas' credibility.
19. These tracks will never be classics.
20. So in 10 years' time this disc will be more useful as a coaster.
21. Actually, in 10 years' time CDs and compilations will be relics.
22. No one will remember Kid Cudi.
23. No one will remember Akon.
24. No one will remember Soulja Boy’s Tell'em.
25. If you do, you're clinging to days gone by.
26. You should buy a full album to help you feel better.
27. Or just get what you want on iTunes.
28. With iTunes, who needs compilations?
29. You have more musical freedom now than ever before.

30. Use it.
31. Don't abuse it through piracy.
32. Take the plunge and listen to something you haven't heard on radio.
33. You'll surprise yourself.
34. And you'll gain some much needed street cred.
35. Remember, you are what you listen to.
36. A good, eclectic music collection could score you a date with that hottie at the CD store.
37. Letting him/her see you buy Now 52 or 53 or 276 will ruin your chances.
38. Forever.
39. 'Eclectic' does NOT mean you listen to rap and R&B.

40. Using both Jason and Sasha-Lee's singles on the compilation is sitting on the fence.
41. Cool people know Jason is the real Idol.
42. South African music is WAY better than Idols and Prime Circle.
43. 4 SA songs vs 16 international tracks = a pity vote.
44. The tagline "That's What I Call Music" is false advertising.
45. Don't believe it.
46. Believe us when we say this is crap.
47. To convince you, we'll give you a few kick-ass free MP3s.
48. Because we're not slaves to the record industry.
49. We're slaves to the good music.
50. We need soundtracks for our lives, not only our drunken Friday nights.
51. Listening to this will drive you to drunken weekdays too.
52. You deserve better.

52 reasons why Now 53 must never happen.

What to read next: Kalahari

Justin 2009/08/14 4:33 PM
The enormous "Buy this album now" ad and the playlist kind of negates your sentiments here. Especially that bit about not being slaves to the music industry.
Nora 2009/08/17 7:42 AM
Come on bitter so early on a Monday morning...
MySay 2009/08/17 9:25 AM
Someone obviously isnt getting any...
Sean 2009/08/17 9:26 AM
Still bitter over the whole Idol thing Sam? Get over yourself Sam its like so last season!
Marius 2009/08/17 9:36 AM
Youre so stupid you cant even think of any good reasons. Where has Forever been a reason. Idiot! None of your reasons make sense.
Floris 2009/08/17 9:39 AM
Agreed. This is a load of crap, like the brainless stupid idiots following trends to feel more secure about their insignificant little lives!!! Mainstream morons.
Michelle 2009/08/17 9:41 AM
This smacks of an elitist 'expert' in the field criticising the 'simple-minded cretins'. There is a massive market for main-stream compilations for those people who cannot afford to buy iPods or can only afford one CD a year. If we had to buy the original album of each of these artists it would cost nearly R3000. So a compilation makes a lot of sense. Your attempt at cynical humour is just an insult to less fortunate music lovers than yourself
Kevin 2009/08/17 9:53 AM
Totally agree with SA Music being way better than Idols and Prime Circle and I work in the industry. Get Taxi Violence's new single on there. Some of the comments are funny and not relevant. All the negatives above are probably people who haven't seen a good SA band Live at their local venue.
Mark 2009/08/17 10:09 AM
Get a life! I have a huge CD collection which includes classics from different genres but I will always buy a NOW CD for the latest hits. The reason why there has been 52 is obviously sales related and if you don't get that then you are a serious moron. Then again you could just be needing a little attention.......
Daantjie Badenhorst 2009/08/17 10:15 AM
I have only ever bought one of these compilations, Now 50, because I considered it great value for money, but never will I do it again. Compilations like these mean that artists who deserve the no.1 spot on the charts compiled according to actual album sales, don't get there. I agree; Now that's what I call a bloody farce!
Kosie 2009/08/17 10:28 AM
uhm pop music has always been stupid. you've only realized it now?
Red 2009/08/17 11:07 AM
I have to agree with Mark & Michelle, the Now collection is great. Some of us can't afford to go out and buy the latest CD from every single artist we like, so the Now collection makes it affordable and gives you a bit of variety. I have almost every single Now CD............can't wait for 53 :)
HVR 2009/08/17 11:16 AM
BUMP series is the only compilations to buy since it is timeless and ..... OMG there is pink elephant in my room with a top hat on.
Joey 2009/08/17 11:46 AM
I agree with Mark. I too have a huge music collection and taste. I’m also an aspiring DJ, and you know what? The crap songs that’s on those albums, apart from the real artists like Coldplay, Prime Circle, Seether etc, is what people want to listen to. I agree in a few years, no one will remember Lady Gaga or Kid Cudi, but you still want to re-visit those “one-hit-wonders’’ and have a laugh. I’ll rather have one Now album with the latest “hits” on, than all the Albums of the Artist, I don’t really like, but have to buy, because the crowd want to hear it. Unfortunately I do have a lot of Now albums, but also a lot of other great stuff. Thanks to Now, you have a glimpse of what is cool “now”, but will not be remembered for ever. Long live the Music, and if it has to be through “Now”, so be it!!
Robert 2009/08/17 11:52 AM
And your article isn't cr@p??? You really have too much time on your hands to write this trash! And MWEB..... to put it on your front page... I'm speechless......
Keith 2009/08/17 11:57 AM
Get real we are not rich like you we can't afford to buy a CD that costs R180.00 for one song Now CD'S are the best thing out,catch a wake up you fool!!
Now And Then 2009/08/17 12:07 PM
Shame, I feel sorry for people who like Now cos they'll probably never understand nor appreciate good, real music cos they're too narrow minded to explore what else is out there so they just accept what they're fed on the radio and assume that's all there is... Oh well, like it or not, these comps seem to be popular money makers but lists like these are still hilarious and spot on!:D
economist 2009/08/17 12:10 PM
The market is never wrong. The fact that these compilations are popular tells us something, and that is that there is a demand for a value-packed cd which will guarantee more than just one good track. Save being a snob for your grammer, which is atrocious.
Dr Steve Brule 2009/08/17 12:21 PM
I can't believe how many people defend this awful garbage, it's probably the same people that would go to a McDonalds in Rome. Pop music is fodder for the idiotic masses, there is no way these people can be called artists, "Lady Gaga,Akon" are you serious? The masses just eat up what is polished and fed to them, you people are idiots with kak taste. Watch some real bands like Taxi Violence, Juggernaught or Shadow Club, now THATS what I call music.
VOTED! The Blogger 2009/08/17 12:43 PM
Your article is Crap, do I need to repeat myself 53 times also so that YOU understand my opinion?
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.