We heard WHAT?

2007-06-18 09:26

Violent Femmes coming to SA
Rumour has it, or rather, Violent Femmes’ website says the rock band will headline Oppikoppi this year. At the “Eoppikoppi Festival in RSA” as they put it. So Oppikoppi organisers can finally stop denying it and just breathe.

The Femmes will be performing on the 9th of August. According to the site, they will also play at The Dome in Jozi on the 10th of August and at the Bellville Velodrome in Cape Town on the 11th.

With that rumour reality, and three international acts still to be announced for the fest, new rumours are sprouting like parrots from comedians' palms. A little birdie told us, for instance, that The Pixies might be on the bill too - is this just wishful thinking?

Hmm, wonder if there will be any money left to pay the SA bands...

Michael Jackson wants to be a rapper?
It appears that old Wacko is desperate to make a comeback. He’s been going around asking every Tom, Dick, Prince and Marshall to work with him. Last week, we reported that he asked Prince to go on tour with him. Prince refused, allegedly because he was jealous that Michael would steal his limelight. (Read more)

Now Michael's on Eminem's ass, apparently having forgotten how angry he was after he was mocked by the rapper in his Just Lose It music video three years ago. Eminem dressed in a 'Thriller'-style outfit in the 2004 promo, and mocked a legendary mishap in which Michael's hair caught fire while filming a Pepsi ad in 1984. In the same video, Eminem dressed as Michael in bed with little boys dancing around him.

Despite all this, Michael says, "The guy is a lyrical genius and I would love to work with him."

Hark! It’s the end of Lark
Well, it seems Lark will soon be going their separate ways. Speculation suggests it’s because lead singer, Inge Beckmann, wants to do her own thing. Semi-official sources claim she's "Just going overseas for a month", presumably to stock up on leather goods. But enough about her sex life...

The good news is, Lark will still be performing in Joburg, Cape Town and at the Oppikoppi festival before they start fokofpolisiekaring (read: performing only when the price is right.)

Damn, we really hope we’ve got this one wrong. Jay-Z decides who Rihanna dates
Rihanna has revealed that her hip-hop mentor Jay-Z screens all her dates.

Rihanna told People magazine, "I just found out from a mutual friend that guys will talk to Jay first before they try to approach me. He's very protective. Jay has my best interests in mind. If it's a good guy I know Jay won't shut him down. But if he's not, Jay will be like, 'No, no, no.'"

Rihanna, who was discovered by Jay-Z and signed to his Def Jam record label, added the rapper never reveals who failed to make the cut. She says, "He actually never tells me. I have no clue who they are, and I guess I'll never know."

We wonder how Beyonce feels about all this?

Mzansi's Paris Hilton
Khanyisile Mbau is really following in the footsteps of the blonde heiress! First she was a TV star, now she is a singer. Yes, a Sunday newspaper reports that Khanyi has signed a R2 million record deal with EMI. We all know Khanyi can dance, but can she sing? We'll soon find out. Since she is following in Paris' footsteps, will a jail sentence be next? Mind you, the average house in Jo'burg has more bars and security than Ms Hilton's current residence.

PJ powers sues over toilet ad
Apparently PJ Powers is getting her knickers in a knot about a toilet advertisement. The ad is currently on show in male public toilets everywhere. It reads “Is it really necessary to watch PJ Powers singing the national anthem?”

Powers is infuriated that her name is being dragged through the mud… or should we say, through the shanks and is planning to sue for R350 000. The ad, it is said, is supposed to encourage people to listen to radio commentaries of sports games and events as opposed to watching them on TV. But the ad people didn’t get PJ’s permission and she wants them to pay.

Bruce Willis is ‘with it’
Amy Winehouse has a new fan: 52-year-old Bruce Willis. In an interview with Film magazine, Willis said, "Amy f***ing Winehouse! Amazing. She has a f***ing amazing voice! She's kind of like Janis Joplin, hits a bottle of Jack from time to time."

(The Live Free or Die Hard star appears to be making up for the ban on swearing onscreen with colourful after-hours language.)

He also revealed that his music collection includes The Rolling Stones and The Killers. He says his 15-year-old daughter introduces him to the latest bands.

He explained, "It's weird. I'm getting back into all the music I used to love when I was a teenager, like The Rolling Stones. I'm seeing The Stones in Paris in June. My 15-year-old daughter Scout has got me into The Killers."

Teach him a new swearword too, Scout. This ‘f**king’ is getting old already.

Keith Richards rocks till the very end
The Rolling Stones guitarist, Keith Richards is 63 years old and still guitaring strong. He says it’s exciting how many young fans they have, even though many weren't even born when the group first shot to fame in the 60s. Which is cool. Neither were most of their wives.

He said, "It's quite amazing to see people come with their grandchildren, but at the same time very heart warming. I don't know quite what it is but it must be something about the music… I've seen 12-year-old guitar freaks down the front who are now in bands and working. It's kind of an inspirational thing in a way to pass it on.”

"They also get on really well with our wives," he added. Actually, he never said that.

Frontman, Sir Mick Jagger, says the band prepare for their mammoth tours like professional athletes, "All the time you're building up and in that way it's akin to sports because you're working up - you practice, you run about, you play the song, you rehearse, but the actual thing's only two hours and then it's over."

"I'll keep on going. I'll do it in my wheelchair" says Richards. You go Grandpa!

- Sourced Bang Showbiz

And about whom? Rumours that Violent Femmes and The Pixies are two of the four internationals booked to play at Oppikoppi. Which is wishful thinking? Plus a little bird told us dirt on Lark... get all the music twitter here.

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