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Isibaya actress Ayanda Borotho shares her opinion on HHP family feud with his wife

2018-11-09 11:12
Ayanda Borotho. (Photo: Ayanda Borotho Instagram)
Ayanda Borotho. (Photo: Ayanda Borotho Instagram)

The sudden passing of Hip-Hop artist HHP left many in shock and while fans, friends and industry peers were still mourning the rapper – the news of his family feud with his wife became a hot topic.

After taking the Tsambo family to court and being lawfully named the late rapper’s customary wife, Lerato Sengadi sparked a debate on social media which saw many wives speak on how badly they were allegedly treated by their in laws.

Read more: Lerato Sengadi is HHP's customary wife – what will she get?

Many had varying opinions on what constituted customary law including Isibaya actress Ayanda Borotho.

In an Instagram post, the actress who plays Phumelele Zungu on Mzansi Magic series Isibaya said,

“It's Unbecoming Wednesday....so still on that marriage topic. So the whole Lerato HHP (no disrespect to his memory) saga was a real lesson for us. I just wanted to share some things I noted and that absolutely broke my heart (putting aside for now that she was treated poorly. Don't care if she was married or not.) Again...none of us have the full or real story but we can learn from what we know.”

1. Are we going to conveniently forget that she moved out after he cheated? So we forget everything she had been through with this man and "remember" Oh she left him? But this is how it is for us isn't it. You know the term "umabuyemendweni"? That term exists for women only. Not men. It is almost as if the success of marriage is dependent on ONE person...the woman…,” she continued before questioning by whose standards a marriage is constituted.

“2. I was really interested to know what constitutes a "marriage" and by whose standards. Law? Family? The couple? Honestly. Someone said to me that this whole Lerato issue is confusing. I simply responded...it's confusing because black people abandoned who they are and accommodated practices that were not theirs. And it really is that simple. “

Check out Ayanda’s full post below.

View this post on Instagram

It's Unbecoming Wednesday....so still on that marriage topic. So the whole Lerato HHP (no disrespect to his memory) saga was a real lesson for us. I just wanted to share some things I noted and that absolutely broke my heart (putting aside for now that she was treated poorly. Don't care if she was married or not.) Again...none of us have the full or real story but we can learn from what we know. 1. Are we going to conveniently forget that she moved out after he cheated? So we forget everything she had been through with this man and "remember" Oh she left him? But this is how it is for us isn't it. You know the term "umabuyemendweni"? That term exists for women only. Not men. It is almost as if the success of marriage is dependant on ONE person...the woman. It doesn't matter what he does, uyibamba ishisa ntombi but hang on...kusha bani, eshe lani? It's interesting to see also (and I have many times) where a woman is estranged from her husband and when he passes away, bayakulanda uyohlala emakhandleleni. But should a woman pass away in this period..well...abakubo will take care of that! Yho?? For centuries women have endured in relationships, in marriages that are toxic, abusive, destructive in every way and we do it so we can flaunt a diamond ring for a world and people who would be happy to see us dead. 2. I was really interested to know what constitutes a "marriage" and by whose standards. Law? Family? The couple? Honestly. Someone said to me that this whole Lerato issue is confusing. I simply responded...it's confusing because black people abandoned who they are and accommodated practices that were not their's. And it really is that simple. In our culture what was marriage before laws, prenup contracts and certificates? When we didn't have white weddings? You know the the term "ubuhle bendoda izinkomo zayo"(not decor, not the ring, not the wedding dress and suits, not the cars...IZINKOMO!)...kanti zikhishwa nini izinkomo that qualify him as a man, with a wife? (Besengibuza nje ngesintu). Asikhulume magenge. #UnbecomingToBecome #UnlearningTheLies #TakingOffTheCoats #IamEnough #ConvosWithAyoungMe #LiveButDontLeaveYourselfBehind #Eve #SikulentoYeWovement

A post shared by Ayanda "MaNgubs" Borotho ???? ???? (@ayandaborotho) on